Friday, April 4, 2008

Wedding Etiquette: Invitations

  • What's the best way to let guests know that children are not invited to a wedding and reception?

    Even when the invitations don't include children, it's best to tell family and close friends -- and ask them to spread the word. But it's incorrect to write "no children, please" on an invitation.

  • What can be done about a guest who doesn't RSVP to a wedding invitation?

    If an invitee hasn't responded within a reasonable length of time, it's appropriate to call or write the person to ask if she or he plans to attend.

  • How should a wedding invitation be worded when...

    ...the bride's parents are divorced and only her mother and stepfather are paying for the wedding?

    Mr. and Mrs. James Samuel Harper

    request the honour of your presence
    at the marriage of her daughter

    Elizabeth Ann Jones


    ...the bride's parents, who have divorced and remarried, are sharing the wedding expenses and acting as co-hosts?

    Mr. and Mrs. Jonathan Blair Brown


    Mr. and Mrs. Robert Rushin

    request the honour of your presence
    at the marriage of

    Susan Jean Rushin


    ...the bride's parents and the groom's parents are sharing wedding expenses?

    All are cohosts of the wedding, so the wording would be similar to the above example, with the bride's parents listed first.

    ...the bride and groom send out their own invitations?

    The honour of your presence is
    requested at the marriage of

    Ms. (or Miss) Elizabeth Allen Clark


    Mr. Carlton Howe


  • The son whom I put up for adoption when he was a baby is getting married. We were reunited three years ago and have a great relationship (he calls me Mom, and his adoptive parents refer to me as Jim's mom). Would it be all right for me to be acknowledged on the wedding invitations along with his adoptive parents? If so, what would be the correct way to word the invitation?

    If you're paying your fair share of the wedding expenses, then your name should be included. If you're not, then it's up to your son, his fiancĂ©e, and the hosts to ask you if you wish to be included — in which case, it's okay.

    If all the parents are to be included on the invitation, it would read:

    Mr. and Mrs. (bride's parents' names)


    Mr. and Mrs. (groom's adoptive parents' names)


    Mrs. (or Ms.) (your name)

    request the honour of your presence at

    the marriage of their children

    (bride's name)


    (groom's name)

    Date and Time


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