How to plan a successful bachelor party

There was a time when tradition held that the groom-to-be should be fêted at a black-tie dinner-party, hosted by his father or best man. This all-male gathering strictly adhered to the codes of gentlemanly behavior, the highlight of the evening being a toast to the health of the bride-to-be. Since then, the trend in bachelor parties has swung full-circle: from the black-tie dinner to the notorious, no-holds-barred stag, complete with cakes sprouting strippers, sizzling videos, and party crashers, and back to the civilized salute to the groom.

But the modern bachelor is party different from the formal festivities of the past in several important ways. The newest bachelor parties reflect the groom-to-be's interests. For instance, a party might feature the watching of a spectacular sporting event (a hockey or football game, perhaps) or participation in a sports activity, such as skiing, fishing, or camping. Or the best man, with help from the ushers, might organize an agenda of entertainment that could include roasting the groom, gambling (where portions of the winnings go the groom), or competitions (darts, bowling, snooker, etc.). The trend calls for memorable, fun, well-organized parties, planned with care and sensitivity.

Great places to hold a bachelor party

• a cottage
• a ski chalet
• a hotel banquet room
• a private room in a restaurant
• in a private box at a stadium or arena during a favorite sporting event

A toast to the host for:

• not scheduling the party the night before the wedding.
• arranging several designated drivers to make sure everyone gets home safely, or alerting a taxi service to provide rides for everyone.
• keeping the guest list manageable. Open-ended invitations, which allow guests to bring along other friends, may result in unduly boisterous activity, as well as in losing the point of the event: the sharing of a special moment in which a friend is honored.
• not assuming the groom wants a monster bash or "female entertainment." Most modern grooms-to-be are responsible men who don't wish to do anything they wouldn't normally do at a party, or upset their fiancées.
• taking into consideration that the bride will probably find out what happened during the party (it's almost inevitable), and organizing a party that's not going to compromise the groom's relationship with his bride-to-be.

Bachelor party toast:

"Drink, my buddies, drink with discerning, Wedlock's a lane where there is no turning; Never was owl more blind than lover; Drink and be merry, lads; and think it over."